[R] Newport Living - Cute is What We Aim For

(I fucking love this song, fuck yes.)


Anyways. So, uh, a couple not entirely emo updates. Instead of cutting or whatever else my mind might have concocted as fucked up ways to deal with shit, for the past three or so weeks I've been working out like a beast to cope with my mind. Currently clocking between 1 and  a half to 3 hours a day, with a max of 4 hours and 20 minutes clocked. I'm still on my supermodel-esque diet, barely eating, but it's keeping up, somehow. It's funny, what I'm doing is equally unhealthy and fueled by the exact same emotions, but the fact it's socially acceptable somehow changes things? Society is amusing. It has had another effect though, which I guess lends some credibility to it being a "better" way of dealing with things. The fact that I now have a decent body again and that it's constantly getting better is... uplifting? To say the least. Not to mention that being to tired to think never hurt either.

I'm starting to cope better with the boredom and the loneliness, but it's so hard to balance the old behavior of introverted, foreveralone.jpg gaming with whatever the hell title one puts on what I was in school, that it's quite stressful in and of itself. But it's a matter of cherry picking, balancing, and just dealing with shit. But I am getting back into SC2, whatever that means.

たいちょ